Happy Festivus Greeting Card
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Happy Festivus Greeting Card

Happy Festivus Greeting Card

A Festivus for the Rest of Us.

Stop crying and fight your father. The Happy Festivus Card is the ultimate holiday greeting for those who find tinsel distracting. Featuring the unadorned aluminum pole, this card celebrates the non-commercial holiday that allows you to tell people how much they have disappointed you over the past year.

It requires no decoration, it has a very high strength-to-weight ratio, and it is the perfect way to opt out of the commercial machine (by buying a card). Let the Airing of Grievances begin.

Why You Need It:

  • The Pole: It celebrates the sheer simplicity of an aluminum pole. No tinsel, no fuss.

  • Cult Classic: Instantly recognized by any fan of the show. It’s a smart, funny alternative to a generic snowman card.

  • Premium Quality: Printed on heavy luster cardstock that can withstand even the most vigorous Feats of Strength.

Specs:

  • Size: 5x7 Inches (Standard A7)

  • Material: Heavyweight Luster Cardstock

  • Interior: Blank (List your grievances here)

  • Includes: Matching Envelope

$0.52

Original: $1.50

-65%
Happy Festivus Greeting Card

$1.50

$0.52

Happy Festivus Greeting Card

A Festivus for the Rest of Us.

Stop crying and fight your father. The Happy Festivus Card is the ultimate holiday greeting for those who find tinsel distracting. Featuring the unadorned aluminum pole, this card celebrates the non-commercial holiday that allows you to tell people how much they have disappointed you over the past year.

It requires no decoration, it has a very high strength-to-weight ratio, and it is the perfect way to opt out of the commercial machine (by buying a card). Let the Airing of Grievances begin.

Why You Need It:

  • The Pole: It celebrates the sheer simplicity of an aluminum pole. No tinsel, no fuss.

  • Cult Classic: Instantly recognized by any fan of the show. It’s a smart, funny alternative to a generic snowman card.

  • Premium Quality: Printed on heavy luster cardstock that can withstand even the most vigorous Feats of Strength.

Specs:

  • Size: 5x7 Inches (Standard A7)

  • Material: Heavyweight Luster Cardstock

  • Interior: Blank (List your grievances here)

  • Includes: Matching Envelope

Product Information

Shipping & Returns

Description

A Festivus for the Rest of Us.

Stop crying and fight your father. The Happy Festivus Card is the ultimate holiday greeting for those who find tinsel distracting. Featuring the unadorned aluminum pole, this card celebrates the non-commercial holiday that allows you to tell people how much they have disappointed you over the past year.

It requires no decoration, it has a very high strength-to-weight ratio, and it is the perfect way to opt out of the commercial machine (by buying a card). Let the Airing of Grievances begin.

Why You Need It:

  • The Pole: It celebrates the sheer simplicity of an aluminum pole. No tinsel, no fuss.

  • Cult Classic: Instantly recognized by any fan of the show. It’s a smart, funny alternative to a generic snowman card.

  • Premium Quality: Printed on heavy luster cardstock that can withstand even the most vigorous Feats of Strength.

Specs:

  • Size: 5x7 Inches (Standard A7)

  • Material: Heavyweight Luster Cardstock

  • Interior: Blank (List your grievances here)

  • Includes: Matching Envelope